LOVE IS...FOREVER?

The game of love is so complicated. It's fragile, it's enduring, it's heated passion, it's cold and frigid. It's a constant roller coaster ride of emotions, and it's supposed to last forever, right? I'm not talking about the love between two friends or two family members. What I'm talking about is the love between two partners who have committed themselves to one another, for better or worse.

There was a popular song by Michael Martin Murphey a number of years ago posing the question "What's forever for?" The song tells the story "that there are love hungry people, trying their best to survive, while right there in their hands is a dying romance and they aren't even trying to keep it alive." Certainly, no one goes into a relationship expecting it to fail. Have we become a generation of people who give up too easily? Or, do we really just grow apart with age? Is there really just one "perfect" person for you, or is that just a myth? How did our grandparents' generation keep the love going? Why are we so eager to throw in the towel?

The early stages of a relationship are the exciting period. It's when the endorphins and emotions are running crazy. Then there is the cooling off period, when individual differences come to light. Sometimes those differences can bring strength to the relationship, and still others can prove to be a divisive. No two couples are the same, no two situations are the same, and ultimately it is up to the individuals to make the decision as to where the relationship is to go.

Is love something we take too lightly in our society? Do we confuse love and romance, or are the two one and the same? I once heard it said that Romance is what you do in the bed on a lazy Saturday afternoon. Love is what you do at 7:15 on Tuesday morning when you are hurrying to get ready to go to work. In a lot of ways, that is true. Love isn't necessarily a "feeling", and all too often, I think we tend to forget that. It's going to naturally have its highs and lows, but when the low turns into a rut, that's a call to action. The question is, will you answer the call or simply ignore it, hoping it will go away..

Here's my confession: I want to know what love is. I'm one of those love hungry people, trying my best to survive...I want the passion, the common interests, the spark that keeps love going. Life is moving along briskly for me and I'm tired of feeling like a "roommate". A relationship can't be one-sided. It has to be balanced. One partner can't play the martyr and say "look at all these sacrifices I've made for you." while the other sits idly by. Relationships are not easy. They take a tremendous amount of work-not by one member of the relationship-by by both. I'm going to keep working, until I find the answer.