GRATITUDE REFLECTIONS 05.24.09

It has been a couple of weeks since my last posting. I actually started writing a gratitude blog last week and never finished it. So, it’s time to get back into the swing of things and start posting more frequently.

Since I last wrote, I’ve had some wonderful experiences. Last week, I went on a short vacation with two of my friends from my Men’s Chorus. Robert, Barrett and I traveled to Asheville, NC to visit the Biltmore Estate and spent a day in Pigeon Forge, TN. I have to admit this was one of the most fun trips I’ve had and really enjoyed bonding with these men. I’m grateful for friendships like these which have somehow found their way into my life over the last year.

There’s been a lot on my mind these couple of weeks. Thoughts about where I am financially, wondering when this house is going to sell, trying to balance friendships, learning more about myself, trying in so many ways to better myself, to learn new things. The greatest lesson I’ve learned over the last few months of my life is that while I may often feel like I’m alone, I am not. I have some of the most wonderful people in my life who continually remind me of this fact.

I’m single again. Lane and I have been working towards making the transition to being just friends. At times it’s been frustrating, but I think we’re doing ok. While I know that I unintentionally hurt Lane, the truth of the matter is that I’m grateful for the many lessons I learned from our time as a couple, and I hope he will soon be able to look back and say the same thing.

I’m physically and emotionally exhausted. Yet, I’m grateful for the innumerable blessings that are part of my life. I do have so very much in my life. I have a place to call home, my health, people who continue to love me in spite of myself. I have friends who are there to push me to go that extra step, to make one more climb up the mountain and continually remind me of where I’ve been, where I am, and perhaps, more importantly, where I’m headed.

I’ve thought a lot in the last few days about my family of origin. While I feel like I’m really just an outsider now, I’m grateful for the person they’ve enabled me to be, the values they tried to instill in me, and that I’ve been able to make, what I hope, are good choices in my life.

Here’s my confession: In the stillness of this evening I pause again to reflect on the goodness that is in my life, trying not to allow the negative things to cloud the positive. Where I am today is light years away from anything I could have ever imagined a year ago. Sometimes my gratitude probably comes across as being too sappy to some people, but I feel like it’s important to let the people in my life know how much they mean to me, and not just take it for granted.

I have a list of things I want to do, things I want to learn, things I hope to accomplish. I’m grateful for the broken road that has led me to the place I am today, to be the person I am today and to be able to have hopes and dreams. I’m grateful for this blog which allows me to share a bit of myself with you. I’m grateful for those of you who take time to read and especially for those of you who take the time to comment.

I’m grateful for so many wonderful things…